The Boggabri B and S Ball

Well my suit was in tact when I left for the track
and my mind was on women and booze.
My shirt saw the iron for the very first time
and I'd even polished my shoes.
Turn right down the highway - you'll find a dirt track
and drive 'til ya come to the hall.
An abandoned old woolshed that looks like a shack,
It was the venue for the B and S ball.

Well the night begun at a sturdy pace
and the grog was going down fast.
But my heart nearly died when my drunken eyes spied
a sheila I knew from the past.
I called out to her and she sat next to me
So I thought that I'd ask her to dance.
But it turned out to be she wasn't looking at me
but my fly was undone on my pants.

At the Boggabri B and S ball.
You can dance all night 'til the first sign of light
At the Boggabri B and S ball.

I was having no luck with the sheilas that night
So I thought I'd just stick to the beer.
But a figure approached me and blocked out the light
and said "man what are you doing here?"
It turned out to be he said he knew me
but I don't think I'd seen him before.
But we clicked up our heels and spewed up our meals
and collapsed in a heap on the floor.

I'll never know how I got through the night
or who carried me back to the car.
I only know this - that I smelt of stale piss
and my lungs were full of black tar.
What I thought was lipstick turned out to be blood
and my memory had just drained away.
I had a lump in my throat 'cos I slept with a bloke
I've been trying to forget since that day.

At the Boggabri B and s ball.
You can stuff up yer life in your quest for a wife
At the Boggabri B and S ball.

Well, the drive back home took around four days
I kept seeing things that weren't there.
I should have turned left at the end of the track
instead of right on the road to nowhere.
When I finally came through, it was out of my way
I was lost in the Pilliga scrub
So I just headed west and hoped for the best
and slept for three days in a pub.

At the Boggabri B and S ball.
My mind was a haze and I was stuffed for three days
From the Boggabri B and S ball.